Stevenage woman with borderline personality disorder speaks out ahead of Mental Health Awareness Week | Stevenage, Hitchin, Letchworth, Biggleswade News – The Comet

https://www.thecomet.net/news/stevenage-woman-with-borderline-personality-disorder-speaks-out-1-6042184

This is a story I did for the local news in Stevenage regarding Borderline Personality Disorder although chose to remain anonymous as it gets the message across to the mental health professionals and the public to aid better research to help others.

Please take a read and share if you can as will help at least one person.

Thank you x

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Recognising Manipulation to save lives

The effects of manipulation are diverse. It can control your thoughts, your behaviours, isolate you from your family and friends, create emotional instability, traumatise the brain to the point you’re repetitively thinking about the manipulation over and over again. Your thoughts don’t run in alignment with what you say.

Your brain begins to use suppression techniques to survive further trauma, it changes the way you see the world.

Manipulative people lack empathy, they are only interested in watching you suffer, they control how others see you, they use normative social influence to destroy others perception of you. You end up feeling out of control and powerless wanting to remain positive.

Trauma survivors are insightful. They seek a world where understanding is prevalent & safety is a priority. Narcissistic injury creates a guilt & shame based perspective that induces suicidal feelings.  You begin to gradually decline in your physical and emotional development. You doubt your perceptions. You begin trusting less & less until the damage intensifies and you’re seen as the blame. Survivors are not to blame for the abuse they’ve had to suffer in their lives except more trauma based resources need to be available especially for emotional abuse support groups.

The differentiation between domestic abuse and narcissistic abuse is in narcissistic abuse the perpetrator is usually calm and collected whilst the victim becomes even more ill steadily over a period of time until they have a catastrophic personality change and realise this isn’t right and start acting out at the traumas they’ve experienced as if they’re in the present whilst in domestic abuse it’s more overtly obvious to the medical and psychological community.

What to say to a borderline during therapy

Psychologists and psychiatrists can play their part in treating a borderline by reorganisation. 

Below I’ve listed ways how:

  1. Replace ‘you are too emotional and take things to heart’ with the words ‘I know you’re struggling, please can you explain to me what happened in more detail and why you feel the way you do? If the therapist is weary of delusions compromising or interfering with the therapy then they can arrange a follow up meeting and ask the same question again for clarification purposes.
  2. Ask a borderline what their creative hobbies are and suggest creative activities they can do.
  3. Remind the borderline they are aware their negative emotions are not intentional but be more parental in a supportive way and suggest ways can  remove the anger from their processes although in times of crisis the anger can be explosive because of the highs and the lows.
  4. Introduce positive communication methods and integrate this into therapy to help the borderline communicate more efficiently in times of distress.
  5. Dont take things to heart with a borderline- they can lose their trust pretty quickly but only because they’ve been hurt so much before.

Einstein…

This is a man who applied physics to real-life situations. To put this quote into perspective what Einstein is referring to is the scientific term “force” – for example; gravity keeps us on the ground; it is an invisible force and this can be applied to words. When you notice patterns within the universe you start questioning the causalities with an open mind rather than follow the crowd with the normalised sociological views.

To listen is to understand,

To understand is to help. Creating change by understanding is far better than judgement for if we try to use force we can break (emotionally) whereas if we understand we are able to help others in life a lot more; apply science to real-life situations and see a difference in the outside world 💛

 

What does missing an antidepressant do to your brain!?

If you have a chemical imbalance within your brain, missing one capsule can have a devastating effect on your health and your life.

I was subject to this. I was wallowing through life, replenishing my soul, afraid to dream of my shadows, afraid to break the eggshells I stepped upon until I spoke up. I spoke up because I had to. I spoke up to save my own life. I spoke up because my soul was fighting for survival. Because of my diagnosis of Borderline Personality Disorder people were horrible to me about my illness and that’s when I remembered Einstein’s quote; “The evil of the world isn’t those who do evil but those who look on without doing anything.”

I remembered my worth. I remembered that I had a soul. I remembered that I’d never lower myself to the level of those who hurt, betrayed or laughed at me during the difficult times. I fought a battle to explain how some conditions affect the brain except my voice wasn’t heard much. I suppose those in medical power sometimes feel like because they have control it makes them feel better to allow others to struggle. Ever heard of the Milgram experiment? Exactly. There’s very few people we can truthfully trust in this world and ourselves has to be the first because if we don’t look out for ourselves we will only be met with more stigma, more discrimination and an ancient society.

It’s time to make change. It’s time to make a difference. I’m living proof that mental health conditions do change the brain and I’m also living prove a borderline can have empathy. What do I owe to the world? My faith. My charisma. My skills. My passion. My love. Education, respect and dignity to all those who are dealing with their demons in the most extraordinary way.

Keep going because you are strong. We will end discrimination and your talents will shine through the cobwebs that plagued your soul. 💙

The Marilyn Project

Marilyn Monroe, our historical icon, wore her curves with dignity, her smile with force and her clothes with style.

Monroe was abused as a child and grew up with mental health difficulties that lead her to take her own life so many years ago. In the age of social media it’s really important people are able to be open about their mental health difficulties to prevent farther suicides. .

It is happening all too frequently. Why are people ashamed of asking for help? Together we can create a marilyn project to save the lives of millions by doing five simple things. Understand, listen, research, accept, help.

Help each other and save a life.

Self-reflection and creative ideas

Many people ask me where my creative ideas come from. They come from my experience, the come from the fireworks of chemicals zapping through my fragile mind.

Am I ashamed of this? No. Why should I be?

Its not about what is wrong with us, it’s about how we can improve our own mental health and wellbeing without affecting those around us. We all can’t have the same opinions. It’s like when people judge your past and assume you would grow up to be a negative individual searching for more pain to add to your life that you’ve already experienced.

This isn’t true. If it was – nearly everyone would have broken down and lost themselves completely by now. Sometimes we don’t even realise our strengths until we are thrust in the darkness, neglected, having that ambition for a better and prosperous life.

Keep going. Because it will happen.