What side of the brain do you use?

 

What side of the brain do you use?

The interaction between both is a game of volleyball, a confusing element within its features, a comprehensive account of our genetics and memory processes…
Skills are what motivates us. Experience is what shapes us. Atoms. That’s all we are atoms.

 

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Is it time to rethink borderline personality disorder?

I thought I’d do a post after seeing a post on Facebook about a kind hearted young girl taking her own life because of borderline personality disorder caused by abuse.

I just want to point out the effects of borderline personality disorder and how it may impact on caregivers:

  • BPD are loving individuals
  • They are not dangerous
  • They are warm and caring
  • They isolate themselves when they feel too overwhelmed, they become angry when they are afraid
  • They experience extreme mood swings when faced with interpersonal trauma and/or distress
  • They think with their heart
  • Its one of the most commonly recognised personality disorders
  • During a crisis the sufferer loses control – as a result this can lead to suicide or intense emotional reactions to triggers that relate to the sufferers interpersonal traumas.
  • They have problems interacting with others and dissociate to mask their inner pain
  • They feel lost and abandoned the majority of the time
  • If intensely bullied/abused may experience delusions and hallucinations
  • Is often confused with Histrionic Personality Disorder, dissociative identity disorder, bipolar disorder, ptsd and narcissistic personality disorder.
  • It’s not a label, it’s neurological and affects the areas of the brain responsible for controlling mood
  • Creativity, drama therapy and music therapy helps with restoring the individual to a normal level of functioning
  • Can affect relationships and are at risk of further abuse
  • Are often criticised by the healthcare professions who don’t understand during a crisis the illness can take over the mind of even the most high functioning borderline
  • This needs to be removed from the personality disorders category because it’s the only personality disorder to have the highest suicide rates and personality disorders start before the age of four -bpd is the result of abuse.

 

Misconceptions of the borderline in relationships 💕

The borderline personality doesn’t refuse to let go, they will let go of someone that doesn’t return the love they give to others. They will message a person a lot to express their feelings and their values:    They love with intensity but they don’t expect maltreatment for being in intense pain. They want validation and acceptance of their genuine emotions. They want to be cared for by another individual. If their needs aren’t returned then this can cause them intense suffering. They fear losing the happiness or love that they have been so deprived from throughout their lives. They crave love, not attention. They crave you to return the love they do passionately want to give. If you have no intentions of committing to a borderline or creating a healthy balanced relationship you’re hurting that person even more. You’re not respecting that individual. You’re throwing them into the fire and shaming them. You’re doing the opposite of the borderlines inner most feelings in the root of their experiences and their personality. Borderlines give others chance after chance for you to love them. They’re lost souls deserving of love. They take their pain out on themselves because they’ve been bruised, they’ve been tortured in more ways than one. They’ve always done good for others but this wasn’t returned or they were accused of not being able to handle being alone. They are often alone because they’ve been neglected. They are often alone because others struggle to identify with who they are as people. They are often alone because society rejects them even though they have amazing abilities. An amazing ability to love the world despite their inner pain. They aren’t afraid to express their emotions. They choose to try live a life of laughter. They follow through with different ideas, goals and plans to try and heal within themselves. They have issues with anger because their brains are constantly hypervigilant and on edge. They want to feel they can be themselves and develop a good level of trust with one individual. Many relationships don’t appeal to the borderline because they want what matters to them. Love. They want the love they know they deserve.

Decisions decisions decisions

I often look back at the career choices I’ve made in the past. The subjects I chose to study. The health choices I made. I don’t regret taking a different path to what I should have taken because I wouldn’t have the awareness or the abilities I do have now and what I want to do with my life. I’m not interested in jealousy, bitterness, betrayal, or being the ‘same’ as everyone else. I’m interested in being myself and appreciating the arts, appreciating what I feel helps my emotional regulation. I’m not interested in recreational drugs or the toxicity of alcohol. I’m interested in growth. I’m interested in learning to accept my mistakes and my wrongs. I’m interested in working through self-help books and creative writing and learning. If I could I’d study my whole life but then where would that lead me – study for the purpose of writing. Doing what I love. It’s a hobby. I want to contribute to society hence shared my recent experiences and described some emotions and mental health issues in creative writing form. Maybe because there’s a division between science and creativity? Maybe creative people can use both sides of their brain? Maybe creative people overthink because their brains don’t know what it’s like to be ‘normal’ or slowed down. When you write you have to expose a character’s vulnerabilities; you can end it on a cliffhanger? Would this bring the reader out in frustration? Or would it leave the reader reading more? How do words impact the reader? Are you able to appeal to the wider audience or is your audience specific? Are you often selfless but in pain? Is your imagination a source of intellectual ability or the power of limbic resonance? Do you question and draw opinions of different themes to any given situation? Do you over-analyse? These are all powerful qualities we can improve. I for one can be very contradictive in my writing to expand upon my current views but in writing we can edit, we can build on the new that matches our most unconscious desires.

The divided world

We are all divided in our concepts, in the way we feel about the world, and the way we see the world. We all support different and opposing levels of regime that separates us and in times of chaos we forget that people who are suffering are human and make mistakes except it’s not the mistake that defines the person it’s what’s shadowed in their heart – their deepest insecurities, their passion to make the world a better place, their enduring capacity to make change. Change is inevitable.

Look after your health biologically but more importantly focus on positive things psychologically as these things will make you more aware and help you to grow, to develop, and cope with life’s challenges.

We are the lights within our souls. We are the path we choose to take but not the illnesses we have to compromise ourselves with. Remember we are all different and we are all valued 💙

What are you capable of?

Ever wondered how you could make a difference to others? Ever wanted to avoid people who drain you?

Your goals over everything. What are you capable of? What are your strengths? What makes you different? What do you enjoy doing?

Do you often listen to others advice without listening to your own? Do you ever feel you can break free from the standardised norms society puts in place?

You may or may not be going through a hard time right now but if you are let yourself heal. The worst moments will pass then create a plan.

If you’re struggling just remember, you’re strong and you have the passion and optimism within you.

What can YOU do? What are YOUR specialities?

1. Print off a CBT workbook and set yourself a time limit every day – 1 hour or even 30 minutes if have children and a hectic life.

2. Take supplements and minimise sugar as this will keep your blood sugar more stable to ease mood swings and will make you feel more energised.

3. Create your own self development folder that no one needs to see but you can fill it out daily.

4. Set yourself creative goals as it has shown by science to improve mental health conditions & ease physical conditions like Fibromyalgia.

5. Socialise with those who won’t judge you for what you experience in your life but would always support you no matter what because they’re the people worth associating with in life.

6. If someone calls you crazy, just remember – great ideas never came from standardised minds. Grades don’t measure intelligence and mental health doesn’t define character. You can achieve anything you truthfully want. Sometimes it takes a life transformation to realise your capabilities. But keep going because you’re strong enough.