Forest Imagery

Allow your soul to feel the warmth of the summer air as you close your eyes and imagine an exotic beach surrounded by fields of sunflowers and dandelions dancing in alignment with the velvet green grass.

Your soul feels passion, it feels delight, it is the symphony of the milk way, an inner warmth that only you can feel.

Really close your eyes. Imagine the blazing hot sun shimmering between the trees separating the path from the shadows, forests of soilders standing guard of engraved copper caves watching over the sea guiding the ships and its sailors.

Imagine a safe spot within the forest where you can let go of your thoughts, a feeling of self-control and self-comfort listening to the echoes of natures most glorious species.

A lighthouse with a light bearing a ninety degree view of the soft white sand.

Breathe in an out slowly but deeply for five minutes whilst imaging the beauty of the forest. The forest by the shore.

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The Isolated Borderline

To the partners of the sufferer. I know how hard you try to help your loved one. I know how hard you try and make communication.

The days your loved one curls up in bed not ready to face the day whilst you put food on the table, the rapid mood swings with such emotional intensity that the sufferer feels devalued because they don’t want to feel that way.

They appreciate you. They love you millions. Even if they don’t show it. They are battling their inner demons crying out for help believing things would get better.

They switch goals easily, they’re depressed, they’re irritable but their social media profiles are full of selfies & posts of self-reflection. They’re expressing their pain so creatively.

The borderline doesn’t want to hurt you. They want to feel safe. They want to feel secure. They want to be able to live a happy life although their positive emotions don’t always reflect their inner mood.

The borderline senses danger. Their minds are in constant flight and fight response because their memories have been moulded to fit in with their most painful experiences. Those who have felt the most pain always know how to love because they know what the opposite is.

Opposites attract. Love releases a chemical called oxytocin within the same brain region that affects the borderline.

Trust me when I say this but she loves you.

She loves you with her heart although she let’s go or tries to keep you when she senses a threat. A threat that you will walk away and find someone else but she passionately tries to avoid to cry herself to the point of self-destruction.

Don’t intend to hurt her because the symptoms will magnify.

Love her as you would yourself; (both men & women)

Break down the stigma. He/she is brave. She has a talent. Help her find it ♡

The difference between ‘thinking’ and mental health conditions

So we’ve all heard the saying – ‘If you can change your thoughts you can change your life.’

Yes this is true…

 

But…

 

Mental health conditions can affect an individual neurologically, physically and mentally that can have a substantial impact on everyday life. Some mental health conditions require medication to keep the brain functioning properly.

We can all change our thoughts through cognitive behavioural therapy or positive thinking programmes… but when does mental health require medication?

Has there ever been a time when you wasn’t yourself? Have you ever felt your brain vibrating? Have you ever experienced personality changes and attacks? Have you ever isolated yourself because of excessive mood swings you couldn’t work out why it wouldn’t stop just by thinking about it? This is more than likely a biological mental health condition.

These types of conditions require medication.

 

What I tend to find in the present day mental health profession is if an individual has been neglected throughout their life then they are seen as unable to improve their present situation and the past experiences used against them when this isn’t the case because ANYONE can improve themselves and their lives. It takes the right amount of understanding, the right amount of support and the appropriate treatment.

Yes I believe in chemical imbalances because I’ve experienced it. It’s time to end mental health discrimination and change the future for generations to come.

Borderline Personality Disorder and Relationships

Here’s another post on being in a relationship with a borderline. Borderlines are loving, they like routine and consistency because it balances their moods, thoughts and emotions. They can often seem socially inept but want to socialise without having the necessary interactive skills to because they were so deprived of these skills as children that they grew up with a different outlook on the world. Relationships can be triggers if they are hurt. They can be stable if you respect and love them. They may experience intense pain and distress and their brains may run at a thousand miles per hour in their writing commitments but in the age of social media and social technology is this necessarily a bad thing? Borderlines could be great for business except they attract narcissists because narcissistic individuals have learnt to shut off their emotions and intentionally manipulate others emotionally as they feed off the suffering of others which activates the dopamine in their brains giving them that sense of power – like a mouse loves cheese – a narcissist will attract an empath… but what happens next??

 

The empath will begin to know something isn’t right; the narcissist will flood them with false beliefs by getting to know them more and more and use their weaknesses against them and their past experiences because they know the borderlines have limited support network because of how they are as people. As soon as the narcissist has got the borderline in a position of trust they will switch the situation around on the borderline and make out that the borderline refused to let go. The borderline will then analyse the psychological manipulation of the narcissist and blame themselves until they self-destruct. They will then be seen as manipulative as before they can prevent becoming out of control they will experience intense anger and pre-occupation with the narcissist. There’s no time limit on how long this will last but once the borderline has hit a mental health crisis they know the brain has activated extra activity and they know it has become absorbed. The narcissist will appear stable to his/her peers, point to the borderline and say “I told you she/he was crazy.” The borderline will begin to experience dissociations, the borderline will start to feel suicidal, the borderline will lose all senses but the narcissist doesn’t know how to love because they’ve suppressed their capacity to. Normal people don’t believe such psychopathy exists but it does. The borderline will absorb the narcissist traits during the relationship trigger but the effects will only be noticed once the relationship has ended.

Why do borderlines attract narcissists?

 

Both narcissist and borderlines have good and bad qualities but the difference is borderlines want love and fall in love easily and appear emotionally available and narcissists pretend to love and appear resilient – that’s how they manipulate. Manipulation isn’t intentional in the borderline – it’s a representation of severe pain but why do borderlines attract narcissists?

The most simple answer is because the narcissist has the strong demeanour the borderline wants – hence the saying opposites attract. The borderline can’t help but want deprived love where as the narcissist wants to be able to control and manipulate.

Everyone has narcissistic traits – it’s not always a bad thing. The positive traits are striving for success, we all want prosperity right? Who doesn’t?

Real narcissistic people love death. Death doesn’t bother them. They are so numbed from their emotions that they have a hard time feeling anything. If you ever go against a narcissist – prepare for others to turn against you. The narcissist already painted a picture of you and allowed you to go crazy before you had the chance to defend yourself.

Protect yourself. Don’t overuse the term. Remember. Real manipulation is subtle.

 

How do we increase our awareness of our selves?

How do we build upon our self-esteem?

  • Write a list of what you value about yourself and how you can make a difference to other people’s lives
  • Write down a list of characteristics you want and believe you already have them
  • Write down a list of positive achievements and attributes you’ve created in your life and how you created them as this will keep the mind focused on creating new ideologies
  • What are your hobbies? Do you confirm to the individual beside you or do you trust your own intuition?
  • If you could have any career you want what career would you choose?
  • Define yourself, take the pen, make a work of art 🖼

Reasons to stay alive by Matt Haig 💓

My experience with depression related illnesses is that it comes from the brain or the tiny centre of the nucleus accumbens…In September 2018 I experienced a whirring inside of my brain 🧠 like my head had literally been shoved in a washing machine and I couldn’t make out what was right or what was wrong anymore – the outside world seemed different, like I could see the world in a total different way. It was like a switch had flickered in my brain and my brain was just a whizz of electric current.

I’ve started to read this book called “Reasons to stay alive” by Matt Haig based upon his own experiences with depression and how he managed to get through it – it was a book I came across when I was suicidal. I thought no healthy mind understands the biological mechanisms of a mental health illness so I have to try my best to get myself through the worst although at this point I couldn’t read properly or concentrate but I could express information and knowledge I had no awareness of ever learning and started to create new fascinating ideas – this was when they said it was borderline personality disorder. I was convinced it was depression because I was so suicidal but because of my “positive” core personality traits rather than the way I was feeling or presenting at face value the depression side went unnoticed so I surrendered to what I believe would help me recover which was try my best at self-help worksheets.

This passage of the book struck a chord with me because I felt exactly the same and it’s comforting to listen to another’s story based upon similar experiences. I hope this lightens another’s soul too…

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Signs of emotional abuse – health and social care

I thought I’d do a post so others can identify the effects/aftermath of emotional abuse in others that I learnt on my health and social care course.

  1. Becoming upset easily
  2. Preoccupation with the abuser
  3. Questioning of self-sanity
  4. Isolation/Losing friends
  5. Unexplained Anger
  6. Irritability
  7. Behaviour Change
  8. Loss of interest in previously enjoyed hobbies/commitments
  9. Self-harm
  10. Self-neglect
  11. Depression
  12. Hypervigilance and jumpy
  13. Fear/confusion of making decisions and choices
  14. Emotion and Mood changes
  15. Lack of concentration/forgetfulness
  16. Physical Withdrawal; particularly in an environment that is a reminder of the abuse
  17. Weight loss/weight gain
  18. Anxiety

If the abuse is prolonged over a long period of time can lead to BPD/and/or CPTSD or PTSD.

Please be aware when the victim is under intense distress it takes time for them to come to terms with a traumatic experience or situation – they may not seem themselves and there’s no time limit on the after-effects of emotional abuse.

People often complain about verbal abuse but subtle emotional abuse damages the lives of men, women and children.

Equal opportunities and communications relevance is a must to safeguard and protect a community as a whole. Some after-effects are so extreme that the victim may even come across abusive and delusional as they’re making sense of their traumatic experiences depending on the nature and the circumstance of the interaction between the abusers and the victims.

This post is for awareness purposes only. 

Protect a loved one, save a life 💙