During my last borderline personality disorder crisis at the time I felt I had no control over the changes within my brain and focused so much on the labels and the permanent factor thrust aside them, I didn’t focus my attention on probability and how my memory can cause my anger.
I’ve built on the new from experience.
I felt at the time well if no one close to me cares the world doesn’t and people are out to hurt me. That’s a negative automatic thought that springs to mind as it was a situation of conflict. This was when I realised the distinction between concentration and conflict.
I realised I was focusing so much on the slanderous negative beliefs that others had labelled me with for being abused throughout my life in more ways than one instead of focusing on my goal which was to separate myself from the mental health condition that inspired me to write this blog.
Ive always loved learning. It’s the most positive part of my memory and I’ve always aspired to go on to achieve better things because I had the belief that I could. I knew deep down I deserved better than what I experienced in my life.
Recently I decided to let go of others false beliefs about me as I realised they were judging at face value rather than looking at causality and helping me and I realised I can only help myself. I’m alone the majority of the time so at first was quite skeptical about the borderline personality disorder diagnosis but then from experience as a sufferer I realised what it actually is. A disorder thrust upon empaths. We were born empaths. We have emotions, we know how to love, we have empathy, we are creative, we are intelligent except our compassionate nature can lead us to be attracted to the opposite of who we are as people and that’s narcissm.
The labels never tell you the good things about borderline personality disorder such as good insight, self-awareness, superb long term memory, able to recall memories since a toddler, creative, has a gift, talent or skill, observant, has superb situational judgement, can stay with one person for a lifetime if they honestly love them back, will continue to fight for what’s right, idealistic and compassionate.
My theoretical view of the psychological personality of Borderline Personality Disorder is INFJ. If you have borderline personality disorder then take the Myers Briggs personality disorder questionnaire on 16personalities.com.
List your results in the comments.